awful Archive

Lord Sutch and Heavy Friends at 50

Scattered among the history of pop and rock music are the occasional oddities: albums made by those whose circumstances or talents in a particular area might not quite have suited them for the task of making an album, but who still somehow managed to do so. French millionaire playboy Philippe DeBarge did so in the

DVD Review: Paul McCartney Really Is Dead – The Last Testament of George Harrison

To the Irish author Brendan Behan goes the attribution of a quote which reads in part, “There is no such thing as bad publicity…” In light of the possible status of this line as some sort of universal truth, I have serious misgivings about reviewing such a piece of irredeemable exploito-garbage as the new DVD

Album Review: War of Ages — Fire from the Tomb

Onward Christian soldiers! War of Ages’ latest offering, Fire from the Tomb may be the worst thing I have ever heard, and that’s saying a lot (I saw Styx on the Kilroy Was Here tour). Standard-issue metalcore riffs of the “look-ma-how-fast-I-can-play” variety, coupled with a punishing bass/drum assault equal…well, not much. The bowels-of-Hell vocals are

Album Review: Vaeda — State of Nature

The debut full-length from this trio is tightly and expertly played, passionately sung, flawlessly produced…and boring as hell. There’s not a single thing here we haven’t heard a hundred times before. And most of those hundred times have been in the last 36 months. Bandwagon riders all. State of Nature sports a soupçon of screaming,

Album Review: Memphis May Fire — s/t

As a card-carrying Pastafarian, I pray every day to the Flying Spaghetti Monster that I am delivered from the random assignment of reviewing Christian hardcore CDs. I simply don’t get how these angry white boys (who in every other aspect look and sound like other barely-worth-merit-of-a-mention bands in the hardcore-without-a-“godgenda” subgenre) manage to keep cranking

Album Review: Mah Jongg – Kontpab

Boy, does this album suck. Nothing much happens musically for the first two and a half minutes of the nearly six-minute “Pontiac.” Listening to it is like wandering into a drum circle populated by robots. The aptly-titled “Problems” evokes images of an out-of-tune Human League. Its expressionless delivery is sub-Gary Numan headache-inducing clatter. The skittering

Album Review: Cradle of Filth — Thornography

This is some very silly music. The first track “Under Pregnant Skies She Comes Alive Like Miss Leviathan,” comes in with a bombastic movie-soundtrack vibe, all robed-choruses and scratching cellos. Of course that’s all flown in, having little to do with the group. Yet it’s the best thing about the album. Think Metallica meets Dead